life (layhf) | push present

Push Present, as defined in Wikipedia, is 'a present a father gives a mother to mark the occasion of her giving birth to their child'.  In my own words, it's the gift a father wants to give a mother not only for carrying the child for 9+ months, going through many hours of labor, recovering post-delivery, breastfeeding the child round the clock and covering the night shift because you're breastfeeding at every hour.  Don't get me wrong, my child is a wonderful gift that could never compare to anything materialistic BUT with everything that we women endure throughout and after pregnancy, something to show a little appreciation from our significant other would be a nice gesture.

I've met women (and couples) that have their own opinions about a Push Present.  Some think it has to be an item of extreme value, while others think that the gift itself is completely un-necessary.  While I am a huge advocate of a Push Present, it doesn't have to be something that would put you in financial disarray (which is what I think steers some people away from it).  Sure, there are some pricey items that would make great gifts, but in my opinion it's the thought that counts. 

I never really hinted any particular item to Matt, and didn't really share a list with him.  At one point I really just wanted a Roomba, but unlike making a Christmas wish list, I wanted him to come up with something that would show some sentimental meaning.  However, if I had a list to share it probably would have looked something like this. 

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Although I do love the idea of something indulgent like expensive jewelry or a really nice purse, I honestly am the type of person who would much prefer something practical like a new MAC computer or luggage.  But in the end, my husband came through with an AMAZING Push Present that he came up with all on his own (as I suspected he would) - he has booked us a fabulous 10-day European vacation next Spring with stops in Vienna and Barcelona.  I've been dying to go to Spain and I'm so excited that he booked a trip to my #1 destination.  He did good, didn't he?

|What are your thoughts on a Push Present? Do you think they're mandatory or completely un-necessary?  If you're a mother, did your significant other give you a Push Present after giving birth?|

life (lahyf) | july 25, 2012

July 25th, 2012 marks the happiest day of my life (okay it's a split even between this and my wedding date).  Our little boy, Liam Patrick decided to come into this world exactly 2 weeks early.  Unlike a traditional birth story, mine required an emergency c-section and even though it wasn't the way I thought it would go - all that mattered was that our little guy came out healthy.  I can't wait to see what this journey of motherhood brings.  Even though my recovery is coming along slowly and sleep deprivation is one that is unexplainable, I can't begin to tell you how happy I am waking up to this guy's face everyday!

life (lahyf) | 10 things I learned from being pregnant

I have just a little over 3 weeks before little Liam is here.  As much as I've complained about my weight gain, adjusted my social life and have adapted to some other hormonal/physical changes, I've learned a great deal in the last 9 or so months.  Not only have I grown physically, but I've matured so much and adjusted to so many new changes.  Usually these changes would scare the bejesus out of me, but the little guy has already changed me in so many ways and I'm so excited to see how much more growing up I do when he's finally here. These are the 10 things I learned (and loved) from being pregnant.

1) Dress yourself pretty:  You grow, grow and grow some more when you're pregnant.  Even on days when you want to live in your ugliest sweats, or in my case Hello Kitty pajama pants,  push yourself to put a little effort into your appearance when going out in public.  The compliments you get from friends and total strangers boost your self confidence, even when you're feeling gross.

2) Make new friends:  Even though you have an established group of wonderful friends who  support you every step of the way - make new friends with other women who are soon to be mommas.  In the last 9 months I've made wonderful new friends and have strengthened relationships with those I only considered acquaintances because of being pregnant.  It's nice to not only have new friends to share each step of this experience with, but when Liam finally gets here he'll have a ton of new other babies to play with.

 photo via bump club and beyond

3) Reinstate or implement date night:  A few months into my pregnancy, Matt and I started establishing Saturday night as our date night.  We go out to dinner then grab dessert or head to the movies.  It's not the most exciting night out, but has become my favorite night of the week.  Before the baby gets here, it's nice to enjoy this time together.  We talk about what we want for our son, how we hope to be as parents and just enjoy each others alone time before we become a family of three. 

4) Buy yourself something that makes you feel good:  Shopping is no fun when you're pregnant - especially if you have to finally breakdown and shop in the maternity section.  Finding something that makes you feel good is tough, but when you find it - do it.  For me, it was jewelry.  It doesn't have to be anything fancy, but every time I was feeling a little down, it was nice to have a nice pick me up.

5) Eat as much ice cream as you want:  I tried (and I use that term loosely) to really keep myself on a pretty balanced diet, but pregnancy cravings are harder to control.  When your body says, "Give me ice cream" - give your body that ice cream.  When are you ever going to have another get out of free jail card to eat like that again?  Just remember to not go overboard.

6) Keep up with a fitness routine:  This will help you feel better about eating the ice cream everyday.  Since I've been pregnant I've thankfully had enough energy to at least workout 3 times a week and although I still continue to gain 2 pounds every week, I feel better about it after a good workout.  It also gives me hope that after the baby comes, getting back to my pre-baby weight will be much easier.

7) Let go of things you can't control:  When you're pregnant, you just have to be more flexible.  There are days when you're not going to feel your best and it's going to stop you from accomplishing everything on your long to do list. Pretty soon after the first trimester, you learn to let go of things you have no control over...especially your bladder.

8) Let your significant other help you every time he offers:  To this day, ever since we found out I was pregnant, my husband still offers to make me breakfast.  At first my self sufficient trait wouldn't let him, but after the first week I finally gave in.  Since then, Matt has offered to help in so many other ways (including buckling my sandals when I can't reach over my big belly) and it's been so nice to have someone who offers to help, instead of me always having to ask for it.  I gush every time he does it because even though Liam's not here yet, he's already a great dad.

9) Admit when you've been a hypocrite:  I will fully admit that I am that person who said that wouldn't do this or do that when I got pregnant.  And guess what?  I've probably done most of everything I said I wouldn't do.  When I wasn't pregnant it was easy for me to be vocal about things I didn't want to do, but when you actually get pregnant it's a different situation.  Yes, I fully admit I'm eating up my own words, but hey at least I can admit it.

10)  Welcome every and any change:  I surprise myself everyday with the changes in my personality and mentality that I am willing to let take place.  It's scary, but exciting at the same time.  Instead of fighting every change that takes place I've learned to embrace it and readjust my lifestyle with this new change in place.

fash•ion (fash-uh n) | summer brights

As you may have noticed my outfit posts have been extremely limited since I've become pregnant.  Although I love being pregnant with my little boy, I don't love being pregnant and haven't felt confident about my weight gain.  Here's a tip if you're a blogger of what NOT to do if you decide to get pregnant - Do NOT look at old outfit pics.  At the time I took those old pics, I was still not confident about my body and felt as big as I do now, but looking at them now I realize that I WAS skinny - or at least skinnier than I thought I was.  You can guarantee I will be using those pictures as motivation to get my body back in shape.

Even though I feel defeated every morning when I try to find something to wear, the combination of bright colors makes me happy and feel good.  Isn't it amazing how colors can help perk up your personality?  So despite the fact that I feel like a house, I know I can turn to bright colors to lighten up my mood.

outfit details | dress - libertine for target (kids section) | necklace - flea market | bracelets - juicy couture & randolph street market | shoes (not pictured) - old navy |

|On days when you don't feel your best, or even if you don't love your outfit, do you feel like colors can help brighten up your mood?|

fash•ion (fash-uh n) | diaper bags

I'm at the point in my pregnancy where I literally thought to myself, "Oh SH*T, I have 10 weeks until baby is here and I don't have nearly half the things I need!"  So of course instead of thinking about the "must haves" like a crib, changing pad, diapers - I fixate on the more fun items like diaper bags.  They're a necessity aren't they?

For awhile I was really fixated on just having Matt get me a Goyard tote as a push present and calling that my diaper bag.  But then I realized that not only would that be the most expensive bag in my collection, but that there's no reason why I would want to lug children's gear, snacks, trash etc in such a high priced item.  I finally came to my senses and put a more realistic list together.

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For awhile I was only thinking of what I would be proud to have slinging over my shoulders vs functionality.  It wasn't until Lindsay founder of Bump Club and Beyond shared a great tip at a recent event that made me re-evaluate my diaper bag criteria.  She said that with a diaper bag you want something that is easy to clean and something that you would be willing to leave with a caregiver (whether it be daycare or with a nanny).  That truly meant that my desired Goyard was out of the question.  So, my list of what I want in a diaper bag became clearer:

• Look for a neutral color bag, sans design.  I'm not one of those people to carry a diaper bag with cute prints or florals.  They're cute, but just not me.  At some point this bag will also serve as my purse, so camouflaging the look of a diaper bag is best with a plain neutral color.
• Make sure it's easy to clean.  I just spent $60 to clean my Linea Pelle tote last week and there's no way I would be willing to pay that on a bi-monthly basis (if not more) just to keep a diaper bag clean.  So stick to materials that are easy to toss into the washer or something that is easy to wipedown.
• Must have a crossbody strap.  My friend Abby said she loved her Petunia Pickle Bottom bag because the straps can be adjusted to wear as a backpack.  I'm more of a crossbody girl, and toting a heavy bag on one shoulder can be bad for your back's alignment so a strap to aleviate some of that weight is key.
• Daddy must approve.  At some point I expect my husband to carry this bag.  As it stands right now with my purses, when I ask him to hold it for a second in public he holds it with pure disgust - holding it away from his body as if it was a bag full with a week's worth of garbage.

|So as I'm finalizing which diaper bag I want, which one of the 4 is your favorite?|

life (layhf) | bump club & beyond

My worst fear is coming true...I'm becoming one of those people who only talks about being pregnant.  I swore P.P. (pre-pregnancy) that I would never become this person.  Don't get me wrong, there's nothing bad about always talking about pregnancy.  However, my friends here in Chicago are in different life stages and I respect the fact that some of my friends don't want to have kids, so I've been trying to be more aware of how much I talk about the nursery, overcoming morning sickness or my choice of childcare. 

Since none of my close friends in Chicago have kids or are anywhere close to being pregnant, I started feeling like I needed a closer support group full of women who know exactly what I'm going through.  Luckily I have my best friends back home in Seattle who have been so kind in sharing their experience about motherhood with me, but here in Chicago I sometimes feel like I'm on my own island. I will fully admit that this is one of the happiest times of my life, but there are times when it's lonely too.  That's why I'm so thankful to have found Bump Club & Beyond.

Bump Club and Beyond is an extremely welcoming group that gives soon-to-be and new moms an opportunity to connect with one another.  Through many events like monthly workout classes, educational dinners, shopping events and much more, Bump Club and Beyond offers the perfect platform for women like me to make friends with others who are also pregnant.  Much like meeting other blogger friends for the first time, you already have one major thing in common which makes "breaking the ice" so much easier.

I've only been to 2 events in the last month, but can't stop telling people about how much I'm in love with Bump Club and Beyond.  My initial intention for going to the events was to make new soon-to-be mommy friends, but I'm benefiting from it way more than expected.  In just 2 events, I not only have been learning about what I should be doing now to take care of myself and the little one growing in me, but about what to expect once he/she gets here.  Even though in my mind I have a lot of time to read books and educate myself about having a child, realistically I'm realizing I don't have enough time.  Bump Club is really helping me prepare for this huge change and it just so happens that along the way I'm meeting some great friends.  It's also not too shabby that at most events attendees walk away with great gift bags and that a few lucky ones also win great raffle prizes (like yours truly). :)

photos | © 2012 Thomas M. Kubik

Whether you yourself, or someone you know, is a soon-to-be or new mom, I highly recommend checking out Bump Club and Beyond. I have to give a fair warning though - these events are addicting so don't be surprised if you leave your first event wanting to participate in many more. 

life (lahyf) | one couple, two dogs...and a little baby

I've been holding off on writing this post for a few weeks now...8 to be exact. If you follow me on Pinterest, Twitter or Facebook, you may have noticed a lot of nursery pinning, complaints about virgin drinks and my weird cravings for spuds. All these hints were my subtle way of trying to break the news of being knocked up. Yup, we are in fact expecting. It hardly feels real and not a day goes by when I don't want to take another pregnancy test just to make sure the little one is still in there, but the morning sickness, and other un-godly symptoms I won't scare you with, have reassured me that it's in fact still in there.

Our friends and family have known for a few weeks now, but my hesitation with breaking the news wasn't because of the whole wait until after the 1st trimester recommendation. In all honesty, it's because I didn't know how to say it. We're so extremely excited, but sharing this news isn't like telling someone you're engaged. You have a ring to show for that - something pretty that you want to show off. When you're pregnant, especially in the early stages, you have nothing to show for. In fact, if anything you have to make more excuses on why you're acting weird. "I'm not drinking cause I'm detoxing.", "I'm eating more carbs cause I'm on a new diet.", "I'm not getting fat, I think I'm just losing muscle." These are all white lies you tell people to keep your good news a secret. Doesn't it seem a bit odd that joyful news is so deceiving in the very beginning?

Like I said, both Matt and I are SO excited, but with every bit of excitement comes fear.  I've always called myself "The Baby Dummy" and there's a reason for that, but luckily I have a fantastic support system that helps me overcome my fear:  My husband who watches my daily intake of tater tots like a hawk and ensures I take my pre-natal vitamins everyday; our families who are just as excited about our news as we are; my loving best friends who are always calling, texting and emailing to ask if we're doing ok; friends who are mothers that are generously offering up great advice; and other pregnant co-workers and blogger friends who I can share war stories with. 

Having these wonderful people in our lives really does help calm my nerves.  It's making this experience so enjoyable and less scary...because let's be honest, the fact that I'll soon have to squeeze (and I really mean squeeze) my way into pants with elastic waist bands, is the most frightening part of it all.